Day 1 to a New Life

I'm going to make a real effort to talk here every day, even if it's just for my own benefit. I'd like to be able to come back later and look back on these posts. It will give me someplace to say "wow, I came from THERE and look where I am now!"

Day One I've spent trying to wrap my head logically about the options left open to me. I'm trying not to think about what I CAN'T do, but rather what I CAN. OK, I admit to already struggling with the first goal. (laughing) Traditional exercise is out for me right now. Doctors orders are to avoid walking, biking (even the recumbent), or any other repeated exercise other than what I "absolutely have to do for daily life". The next step surgically will be a total knee replacement but he doesn't feel I'm quite to that point yet. My goal is to do anything I can now, while we watch what's happening inside the knee.

That leaves me with three main forks in the trail:

A) Do nothing. Answer-- unacceptable.

B) Lap Band Surgery. Answer-- possible with further research.

C) Water Exercise. Answer-- possible immediately.


It is what it is I suppose. Doing nothing is no longer an option, and the idea of Lap Band is possible but not something I can do immediately. Water Exercise is something I can start tomorrow, so that's the direction we're going to start. ** Today** is the goal, not two months from now. Water exercise it is. (nodding)

I was initially freaked out by the idea of accepting the Lap Band option. In the middle of the night I was up and awake (thank you to whatever germ moved into my head and caused this cold!!) and my sister Paula happened to be awake at the same time. (thank you whoever called her as a vet emergency that wasn't) Together we explored the idea. It seems a little more doable now-- she's so good at that!-- but the next step is to talk to our dear Dr. Fowler. I agreed to leave that as the possible final outcome but tabled it for research.

In the meantime, I will start tomorrow exploring the two options for water exercise in town. My knee is responding well to the injection I took on Friday and the rest I'm giving it this weekend. It's hard to think about food given how bad I feel right now from the cold, so plans for reworking my daily diet can wait until tomorrow.

My weight is not something that anybody in my world can miss. It's hard for me to draw additional attention to it, to ask those around me for help. To admit that maybe I just don't have the willpower to fix this with traditional means.....but that's exactly where I am, where I MUST be. It's like admitting you're a failure. And maybe that's the first step toward the other side of the woods.